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My tyep first boyfriend, Stonefist Murderew not his real name—his Dungeons Dragons monikerwas a proud member of our school's computer club. And the mathletes.

Stonefist was an underweight Seeking an honest nerdy type who collected Japanese comic books. Love is simple in nerdu school "You like ketchup on your fries?

Me, too! And for about three years, that's what he was. Hard to believe, but before I came along, Stonefist had never had sex with anyone. Now he was getting daily five-fingered sonatas from a girl who could rattle off every species native to Tatooine.

He was pretty psyched. I was pretty psyched, too. So Stonefist and I continued Seeking an honest nerdy type a state of mutual psychedness. Until the first semester of college, when he dumped me for a "physical therapy" major named Traci, a former high school cheerleader with lots of unironic kitten posters on her dorm wall.

You might be thinking: Boulder colorado wife. would Stonefist want a cheerleader when he already has a kindred dungeon master?

I wondered that, too. This was my first glimpse of a very important truth: In matters of sex, nerds are no different from any other hormone-addled dude in possession of a penis.

Now, this revelation may seem obvious to you. But it's not obvious to womankind.

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Women like nerds. Sure, not every woman Kim Kardashian and not every nerd Stephen Hawking. But as a general rule, very much yes. Especially now that nerds are experiencing something of a golden age.

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It wasn't so long ago that being a nerd meant getting folded into trash cans and hung from flagpoles. Now it's basically a Purple Heart. Who are today's captains of industry?

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Nebbishy dweebs who spent their youth unpacking computers instead of unhooking bras. And Hollywood is run by grown-up geeks ahem, Apatow who cast roly-poly beta males like Seth Seeking an honest nerdy type and Jason Segel as leading men. All rights reserved. We also zn for nerds because we assume that they're going to be the "nice guys.

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Ever since the fateful day a health teacher first referred to our nether region as a "treasure box," we've been urged to seek out a guy who will appreciate us always and forever i.

And we've been taught Seeking an honest nerdy type think this way by Adult want casual sex VA King george 22485 from our well- meaning bubbes to Cosmo, the magazine seemingly penned by a drunk brothel madam.

A article titled "7 Reasons to Date a Geek" contained this stunning piece of advice: Nerds will treat you like the Seeking an honest nerdy type Coming of Christ because it may actually be their second time coming. Inside a woman, at least. But as someone who has spent the past decade dating a whole bunch of nerds, let me tell you: It's all a lie. Of intergalactic proportions. Just to be clear, I'm sure there are plenty of nice, normal, devoted guys who have blown both literal and figurative loads on Kids in the Hall collector's items, just as there are probably some porn stars with dads who took them to the zoo every Saturday.

But they're much rarer than you think. Because nerds tend to nurse their high school wounds with the dedication of war widows.

Sure, sometimes that makes them more sensitive. But just as often, it makes them more vengeful. Lots of sweet teenage nerds grow up to be Seeking an honest nerdy type adult nerd-holes. Consider my smart, beautiful friend who dated an ex-nerd turned successful comedy writer, who incidentally Seking like Michael Cera if Michael Cera were a lesbian. He was mistaken for a girl throughout high school and, as you might imagine, mercilessly bullied. He finished their first bumbling dinner date, she told me, with a "messy, goal-oriented lunge.

On the fifth, he insisted, Seeking an honest nerdy type all the smoothness of a bonobo, that they have sex before dinner lest he get "too antsy. Another friend dated a nebbishy programmer fun fact: That didn't stop him from breaking up with her every six months, the minute any other female gave him the slightest inkling she wanted to have sex with him—really big obvious signals like, you know, aan him a Facebook friend request.

And Seeking an honest nerdy type time he ttype into the breakup conversation so that he could boink his way up the social ladder, he would start to weep.

Because even when he was being cruel, he couldn't entirely shake his harmless-nerd persona. After all, it's the nice-guy-who-never-gets-laid shtick that gets guys-who-never-get-laid laid. Like, all the time. If you suspect you might be one of the unsavory xn of nerds, ask yourself a few questions: Do you see yourself as a perpetual underdog in life's great battle to get action?

Do you believe your underdog status entitles you to Seekinb a sort of psychosexual revenge against those who Seeking an honest nerdy type historically prevented you from getting laid i. You are probably a nerd, and also kind of a dick. Please let me offer some unsolicited advice: There are better ways to work through your childhood torments—like, say, bouncing a basketball or visiting a nice lady with a soothing voice Seeking an honest nerdy type a prescription pad.

You might also consider dropping the whole sensitive, emotionally intelligent, unlucky-in-love mensch act if you're really just looking to add another stain to your Transformers sheets.

Women don't mind the occasional cad, if we know what we're dealing with from the get-go. In short: Be honest about who you are.

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Real men might talk about Jedi mind tricks, but they don't use them.